It’s easy to lose sight that you have changed over time in your relationship/marriage. Change can be good but some changes can jeopardize the attraction you feel for your lover.
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Men |
|
| Before Marriage | After Marriage |
| Rock hard abs and model physique | Protruding abdomen and putting on “comfort weight” |
| Greets partner with little gifts to say “I’m thinking of you” | Greets partner with the question “Oh honey, what’s for dinner?” |
| Opens doors for you | Sit around the steering wheel and yells “aren’t you coming in?” |
| Fulfills most promises made. | Promises remain promises most times. |
|
Women |
|
| Before Marriage | After Marriage |
| Wears makeup often | Wears makeup only on special occasions |
| Hair nicely groomed in the latest style | A ponytail is the regular |
| Bi-weekly manicure and pedicure | Nails are begging to be done |
| Avid weight watchers | Complacent about getting back in shape |
| Hangs out with girlfriends and go clubbing | Seldom spends time with girlfriends to just hang out |
| Tight jeans and heels are the norm | Baggy jeans and sneakers does the trick |
Ok, so maybe we exaggerated a bit, but this was done to make a point. The effort that goes into courtship is often way more than what goes into maintaining a good marriage!
Yes, there will be changes, especially if there are kids involved but these changes should not be so drastic that it is the exact opposite of what was. Such drastic changes are more or less a turn off hence a marriage that lacks attraction, fire and passion between partners. Saying “I do” doesn’t mean “I stop…”
Can you see why your partner anxiously waits for the lady from Accounts to walk by in her tight jeans and heels or drools when that Trainer guy from the gym runs across the park every morning? This happens because that’s who you use to be.
Your partner yearns for the times when you use to dress up for him/her, put effort into looking stunning despite baby fat, write boyish love notes just for the smile it would put on your face or buy a little gift on your way home from work to say “I’m thinking about you”.
Doing little things like these keep your marriage alive, it’s not hard, it just warrants more effort. Don’t let drastic changes ruin your marriage, get back that determination you once had and maintain your attractiveness for a passionate marriage!
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